It's the little things

I've actually done pretty well the last two days, no tears and even a spring in my step again. I'm no Little Mary Sunshine but I can't stay in a fugue for very long before I snap out of it.  I'm just not made that way.  God has everything to do with it.  It was as if I could feel Him reach down from heaven, tuck His finger under my chin, and lift my face toward Him to remind me all that I need is with Him and in His power.  I only cried a little bit reading Donna's blog today, just a teensy bit, then I sent a fervent prayer for comfort and it passed  quickly.

Donna will be getting up in a little bit to get started with helping get ready for her church Thanksgiving.  I know she and Aaron will have a wonderful day spent with plenty of people thrilled that they are there.  Donna is built like me, she blossoms in a large group setting, loves the energy of that type of gathering.  I used to have them to enjoy in the past, first during my childhood holiday gatherings with my family and my dad's then as a teenager with my mom's extended family.  As a young Navy wife we would gather all the stray singletons still in town during the holidays and had them come to our place for dinner with our other military family/friends.  When the girls were little we would spend them with my mom's brother and my cousins at their place.  But in the last 10 years since Les has retired, it has just been our little family and a couple of the kid's friends and/or their boyfriends.

It's just not the same as the big family or "family for now" gatherings that I've always enjoyed.  This year will be extra quiet without Donna and Aaron.  But somehow God has pulled it off and I'm actually excited about tomorrow and whatever it brings.  If you had asked me just this past Sunday I would have told you I'd prefer to just pull the covers over my head, hide out watching tv on my computer, eating junk food and crying until it passed.  But God has blessed me with a new perspective and while I can't quite rejoice that Donna and Aaron won't be here.  I am very happy that they will have a wonderful day with those that they are among.

I keep finding small silver linings each day to put in my "box of gratitude".  I don't actually have a box, but I think I might just make one and have the inaugural kick off tomorrow.  Then open it next year on Thanksgiving to see what made me grateful throughout the year.  I know I won't be so consistent as to get something in every day, I'm just not that good.

Anyway, I just thank you Lord, my loving Father, that you care enough for me to not let me suffer for too long before pulling me out of my misery to enjoy the gifts you have so lovingly lavished on me.  I just pray that I can continue to remember this every time I'm tempted to be ungrateful.

Even so, Father, it is good in Your sight.